February 2012
7 posts
2 tags
1 tag
2 tags
The Truth About My Slowly Becoming Bridget Jones
Slightly overweight.
Drinks too much.
Wears short skirts.
Obsesses over why a boy isn’t calling me.
Dating Hugh Grant and Colin Firth
January 2012
38 posts
5 tags
The Truth About Embarrassment
Waking up the morning after a binge drinking night to find you’ve taken pictures of yourself trying to look sexy in Photobooth. (This may or may not have happened to me this weekend. The pictures are pretty funny. I’m trying to decide if I hate myself enough to post them. I mean what? No, not me.)
Being called out on never remembering someone’s name.
Late night text messages...
That many?!?!: Valentines? →
drmurdermachine:
Looking for someone to be my valentine this year. What I have to offer is a wonderful home cooked meal, and the company of a cleaver and handsomely dressed man.
Here are some guidelines to see if you would fit the bill:
・If you are familiar with your original 150 Pokemon
・If you have seen and…
Hey guys, date my friend Chris. I don’t want to sleep with him,...
2 tags
BREAKING NEWS
CELEBRITY BAD AT RELATIONSHIP!
5 tags
The Truth About The Talk
The “I’m not looking for a relationship” talk. Personally, as someone who’s single and dating for pretty much the first time in my adult life, I’m not looking for a boyfriend. But when do you bring this up. In the past, I’ve found that people that say this too early into dating are covering something up. But other side of the coin, people that wait too long and...
3 tags
1 tag
Watchgregrutter:
(beckybuckwild)
1 tag
The Truth About Things I'm Looking For In A Man
Stuck up.
Half-witted.
Scruffy looking.
Nerf Herder.
Doesn’t get this reference. I fucking hate nerds.
5 tags
The Truth About The Easiest Ways To Ruin Your Own...
Washing your hands with an unfamiliar soap. For example right now my hands smell like I’ve been jacking off one of those soft pink frosting sugar cookies.
Set up a budget. Apparently shoes are not a life necessity.
Read about how Tyra Banks met her new boyfriend while traveling in Asia. Bonus points for reading while listening to Dubstep.
Do and/or say something stupid the night before....
Harris Wittels and June Diane Raphael Cast in... →
carolineeand:
popculturebrain:
!
YES!
This gives me a million smiles.
1 tag
The Truth About Advice From Oprah
I don’t own a panini maker and I’m not happy. Coincidence? I think not.
Read books to make you smarter. I’ve read Twilight and now know no one will ever love me. Thanks Oprah.
Have a best friend named Gayle. Ladies and gentleman, my darling mother, GAYLE Nachlis. #1 bff.
Wear color. People will be happy to listen to what you have to say if you do.
DON’T MARRY...
1 tag
WatchThe Truth About Realizing You Have A Crush On Harry Potter
2 tags
“I want to report a rape. I feel as if my body — or, at least my body of work —...”
– Kim Novak
Hmm, not a great choice of words there Kim.
1 tag
1 tag
The Truth About Me
I is good.
I is kind.
I is important.
1 tag
The Truth About Ways Not To Describe Oneself
Lets just say I don’t look very smart. (Actually used this one today. A poor choice)
Lady in the bed but a freak in the streets…wait.
Dripping in metaclorines.
I’m like a mix of [insert any celebrity] and Bruce Vilanch.
I’m attractive once you get to know me.
2 tags
December 2011
39 posts
